Jan 29, 2010


I've had a lot of goodbyes in my life. Moving to a new Country was the start and since then it feels like goodbyes have been an constant companion. Yesterday was a goodbye day. Caroline and Emelie flew away to America this morning. To think that they are already with my family makes me happy and, of course. sad too. I want to be there with them! 
  We spent yesterday packing, modeling (Well, Emelie and I were the models while Caroline was our, very professional, photographer, the pictures turned out rather nicely!) and laughing. I am truly grateful to God for the connections that he has opened up. To think that my sister-in-law and her best friend are off with my brother on a road trip is rather mind boggling! Last year when Caroline started bible school she was so worried, though she truly did pray constantly that Abe would get his visa and that he would be able to come, and how everything just worked out. How Emelie came into the picture and brought craziness and first and foremost joy to Abe and Caroline. I ended up smuggling myself in in their little group and am so grateful that I did. I'm going to miss them.
  Today was a long day at Church, we had an open house to collect food and clothes to the Church in Riga. They have it extremely tough over there, lots of children and adults living on the streets. It was so wonderful! So many people came and a whole bunch brought with them lovely clothes. One lady had a bag filled with knitted scarves, gloves, and hats, all brand new. Wonderful when people give above and beyond. Now Robert is over and I'm wondering if he is going to make it home. Christofer and him are talking on the couch and every few minutes Roberts eyes seem to slowly close. Poor boy, he sure works hard! 
  Off to bed, first have to kick Robert out ;)

Goodbye Emelie and Caroline. Jag kommer saknar er.

Jan 25, 2010

Soon and very soon our we are about to take our first step

Things I'm thinking about
2. Packing
3. Tallinn

Jan 22, 2010

We need one another

 I have a confession to make. Earlier this week I posted an entry that I later deleted, and if anyone read it, I apologize. I sounded like a 'warp frustrated old woman' and no one wants to read an entry posted by a 'warp frustrated old woman'. I try to be honest on my blog, but exposing all my flaws is not only dangerous to myself but to others. I want those who read this, though it may be a few, to be encouraged and strengthened. Life is complicated enough without me ranting on about how horrible it is. Like I said before, I will be honest, and with honesty there is bound to be things that are not uplifting, but that last entry was taking it a step further. I have bad days, like everyone else, but I also have a loving and caring God to turn to and a loving and caring Husband. Last night we had a long conversation. I expressed my fears and disappointments with my life, and he quietly but firmly told me that that was my first wrong move, it's not my life, it's our life. It's a matter of trust and its always hard to trust people because no matter what they are going to disappoint, but a life without trust is no life at all. I don't have great ambitions, but Christofer has enough ambition for the two of us. Most of the weaknesses in my life Christofer makes up for and in his eyes it is visa versa. I can disagree, but I agree that we would definitely not be the people we are if we didn't have one another. God placed us in each others lives for a purpose and though it's very difficult to see that purpose at times, it is still there and I need to trust, trust God and trust Christofer that our life together will work out for the good. It's so easy to allow thoughts and feelings to take control, instead of controlling them. Yet, its probably one of the most important lessons in life.

  Take every thought captive under the obedience of Jesus Christ
Life's battles don't always go to the fastest or strongest man;but sooner or later the man who wins is the man who thinks he can

Signing off for now.


Jan 21, 2010

Sick equals sleep

So I have basically slept the past two days. Been somewhat sick of late, I say somewhat because its been coming in waves. On Tuesday I woke up with a headache and around about midday I laid down to take a small nap, I woke up to Christofer telling me that in an half hour we were suppose to have our church meeting for the children's group.  I guess Christofer figured I wasn't going to make it because the next thing I knew he was bringing tea and vitamins to my side. I have a wonderful husband! I then took a looonnngg bath and read my book. I was suppose to work on Wednesday but my head was still killing me so I canceled, however, throughout the day I felt quite fine and I was able to spend a few hours with my neighbor Vanessa, unfortunately, I felt a little woozy afterwards, but I hope she didn't feel like I was out of it the whole time. We had a lovely little chat, it was good to hear how her life is slowly falling into place, and how she is starting to believe in something, just a few more steps...don't worry Vanessa I'm praying for you. I hope in our next apartment we may have as good as neighbors as we have had here, they really have been great!
  We then had the three oldest Sheikh's over for dinner. Venos, Jwan, and Jovan, they are a family from Irak and though they have only lived in Sweden for a year their Swedish is almost flawless, and that being that Swedish is their fourth language. So impressive! They are such sweet friends, sure going to miss them too.
  Ahh, the joys and trials of moving.

 So, today I'm pulling myself together and going to get somethings done. Like, well, organizing our photos, which means lots of happy and sad memories come flooding back. I'll post some below, pictures that is ;)
  I think I might skip our Children's church tonight, feeling a bit woozy, but tomorrow its back to work and reality, three days of being sick is quite enough!

  All my love,

Oh, silly blogger, won't allow me to post pictures. I guess I'll be back later.

Jan 17, 2010


  Spent the better part of the morning looking through photos, reading blogs, and watching random videos about the earthquake in Haiti. So very saddening. One little girl was caught under her house for three days, they had a video of rescuers trying to free her, they didn't have the right tools to get her out so it took a very long time, you could hear her screams in the background, very haunting.
   Churches, organizations, and lots of different people are flocking to help. I'm amazed and challenged by those who drop everything and offer their lives to serve. I know we can't all be there right this moment, but it does shake you up a bit and make you realize how important it is that we have one another and most importantly that people are willing to help, be it in giving of time or money.

  I read an article from  Relevant recently where the writer stated that even though poverty isn't our fault it is our duty to do something about it. It is easy, at least for me, to feel overwhelmed and helpless, but I have to remember that it starts with the little things, not everyone can be a Mother Theresa or a Tom shoes, but if we are  willing and eager we can together make a difference. I want to help make a difference, unfortunately good intentions won't get me very far. I suppose it comes down to one step at a time.

    Also, I wanted to write a little note about my Aunt Sue, my Mom's brothers wife. She passed away on Wednesday, January 13, 2010, after a long and painful bout of cancer, she was a remarkable woman. I wish I had known her better, but the memories I do have of her are from my childhood. She use to teach my cousins and I many different songs about elephants and Gods creation. I still remember most of the words and have, in my turn, taught them to my children at work.

 May prayers surround my Uncle and my two cousins in their pain.


Jan 15, 2010



Spent the day with my sister-in-law Caroline. Soon she will be off exploring the States with my younger brother and when she arrives back in Sweden, we will most likely be in California, or at least on are way. So, we decided it was time to spend some quality time, a fun date. We sure did have fun! Yummy food, a refreshing skiing excursion, sauna, more good food, and a very moving movie. The film was called `Adam´and if you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. Just one of those movies that makes you appreciate life and the beautiful and sometimes not so beautiful elements that come our way. The music score was lovely, filled with songs from several of my favorite artists.
    Now, I am sitting in the Karltorps basement waiting for my husband who has had a very long day. He was up extremely early, drove to Stockholm where he had an interview for his green card(They said 'yes'!), and then spent the rest of the day at several different jobs, now he is still at the office and it is already 11pm, I sure hope he is on his way. Having a husband that loves his job and that job includes him being his own boss, calling his own hours, isn't always easy, but the days when we can sleep in late and the times when he can take off for no apparent reason, well, then it is worth it. Still, sometimes, I wish he had a normal job.
 Speaking of job. My boss called today and offered me a job that starts on Monday and is available until we move in February. Its just what I needed. Thank you God for working all things out for good.
 Off to call my husband.

Jan 13, 2010


It's freezing outside and inside. Not sure why but Christofer's office is absolutely solid ice! To make matters worse I can't get a hold of Christofer to tell me how to turn up the heat and I don't really have the nerve to go ask someone else, after all they might think I'm an impostor.  Indeed an impostor thats not feeling so well.
  You see, I've been here all day since I figured I could get more work done here than at home, because at home I sort of get lost in a world of procrastination. Christofer had lots of work lined up at different locations and I figured I could sit at his office while he was away, well, you already know about the lack of heat, but worse than that I started to get hungry and the only eatable looking food was a box of Chocolate muffins. I'm not a huge fan of store bought muffins, but the label promised 'large chunks of chocolate' so after an hour or so I figured it was just as well that I ate one. It was dry, bland, and completely void of large or small chunks of chocolate, but sad to say, I still ate the whole entire muffin.

   Well, I better go get some work done, maybe I'll start with some cardio to defrost my frozen fingers.

III'llll wwwrriiitteee llaatteerr

Jan 12, 2010

Two times too many

This is the second time this week that I have ruined perfectly good meals to be! First it was a disgusting tasting stir fry that I happened to create while listening to a really suspenseful book on tape, I added chicken broth to salami and frozen vegetables. GROSS!  Now it was a really yummy bread that I have made several times, but for some strange reason I ended up measuring out 6 cups of water instead of  the required 6 deciliters and then adding 1 liter of flour, I think you can guess what happened, I could not figure out why it was so watery...until I realized I was holding a cup in my hand. URK! I have a feeling its not going to rise.
 I'm going to take a moment and feel sorry for myself.........AAAHHHHHhhhaaahhhhahhhahh..... *sniff*........

I feel better now.

 On to something new and exciting. We talked with our Church yesterday about us eventually moving, we were worried that they would be disappointed or upset, since Christofer recently stepped up, after many years as a youth pastor, to more of a elderly roll, but they were supportive and caring. Not that I didn't think they would be supportive, but they were above and beyond what the situation called for. They prayed for us, told us they would miss us, and then we finished the evening with fika. The perfect Swedish way to end an evening. I'm sure going to miss everyone here, especially our church, they are such wonderful people, so loving, understanding, and first and foremost godly.

  Well, I'm off to start organizing. Christofer is off making money and I am here trying to get our little apartment in shape. I'm going to miss our apartment.

 Off to work  I go...high ho high ho....

Jan 9, 2010

Some Saturdays

Some Saturdays are lazy. This Saturday was lazy and it just keeps getting lazier. I like lazy, when it's the right kind of lazy, the lazy where you take time to enjoy others company, watch good movies, and eat good food. And that is exactly what we have been doing.
 I watched 'Northanger Abby' while I folded clothes, and though Christofer claimed to be writing some of his clients, he kept peeking over his laptop to watch the screen.
   For lunch I made salmon. Yes, indeed, I made fish. A miracle,  but it is also part of my New Year resolution to do things I don't normally do. The recipe was from Martha Stewart's and it looked so yummy and healthy that I couldn't resist. It didn't taste quite so good as it looked but I added a little brown sugar and lots and lots of dijon mustard to mine and I was able to swallow almost the whole filĂ©. Impressive for a girl who last year, as in two weeks ago, could barely stand the smell of fish. Christofer was happy and amazed, which makes me happy...

   Christofer has had worship music on for the past half hour, amazing how it automatically fills the atmosphere with God's peace. There truly is none like our God.

  Off to spend some time away from the ever consuming internet.

To a year filled with new experiences... adieu

The recipe

Jan 7, 2010

Lux soap: For the modern woman, without fear for her satins and silks

I've fallen in love with 'Lux Radio Theater'... they have a collection on Spotify, just follow the link below, if you have Spotify that is ;)Jimmy Stewart – Lux Radio Theater - The Moon’s Our Home...so wonderful.  Life seemed so simple and so carefree in the early 20's and 30's, I know of course it wasn't but its nice to look back and dream. The radio station had the likes of Jimmy Stewart, John Wayne, Bette Davis, and the list goes on and on of absolutely incredible actors and actresses. I recently listened to 'Magic Town' with Jimmy Stewart and it ended with the following quote. It made me happy and hopeful for our World today.
 'Christmas is a time for sharing and giving and this year we Americans have an opportunity to give the greatest gift of all, that of life itself to millions of starving Europeans, we can do it by pledging ourselves to observe to the letter the food conservation act by eating no meat on Tuesdays and no eggs on Thursday and by saving at least once slice of bread a day. A small sacrifice for us, but one that can help those nations that believe in freedom and democracy make peace on earth a permanent reality.' -Lux Radio Theater


Back to normal life. Normal life isn't so normal, but I would like my life to be a little more normal. I would like a job, but just not any job, a job were I could learn new things and grow as a person. I would like to be more disciplined, to be able to learn new things without feeling overwhelmed, and I would like to help others more and well...now I feel like I'm writing the thoughts and feelings of almost every single person in my situation, but as my lovely husband says, what's the point of stressing about the things I want to do, why not just do them. I wish I was more like him, but I am not and though I know I can change I know I need to surrender completely to God and allow him to fill me with strength and wisdom, because I can't do it on my own. I think thats the hardest part. Giving up what and how I want my life to be and allowing God to change me, yet, he is the only one that matters in the end. When it's all been said and done there is just one thing that matters did I live my life to please him or did I live my life for myself? I read a really thought provoking quote the other day

' If you approach the World with an apron of a servant, then you are allowed to go places that you can't go if you approach it with the crown of a King.'  -Jon Foreman

        I love the way other people can be an example by simply being Christ like.
       On a new strand of thought, this week has been the coldest week in my Swedish history. Minus 20c which is minus 4f, incredibly cold, but amazingly beautiful, feels like we somehow landed in a frozen wasteland, everything coated in sparkling, shimmering diamonds. However, the best way to experience all of it is by standing by the heater looking out the window.
 On Tuesday Caroline, Andrea, Linn, and I went to Stockholm to look for a wedding dress for Linn. It was soooo cold, it almost hurt to breath, but we ended up walking to several different stores. Two were brimming with beautiful dresses, but the salesclerks where the rudest and completely stuck up brats I have ever met! It was absolutely laughable the way they paraded around making us feel like second class citizens. Definitely as Caroline stated 'Pretty woman warning', meaning they thought us dirt poor and not worthy of Stockholm style, or something.  The last stop was a tiny little shop owned by a woman that sewed everything by hand. The dresses had a sort of 'Lord of the Rings' genre and were stunning, and she was a much needed breath of fresh air kind, funny and helpful. After we defrosted ourselves on cappuccinos and warm food.
  The rest of the week has been a series of different plans. Christofer and I are trying to decided how everything is going to take place. Not easy, but thankfully we can always turn to God for help.

  Off with my computer and on with the days work...vi ses